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Most people, at least once in their lives, go through a phase of mental and emotional fuzz where things don’t make sense and the daily actions that we do don’t point to an end goal that we wish to achieve.

People usually end up in such a state because of financial or familial responsibilities or unexpected events that lead to a big change in the life that you were leading or wanted to live.

When we are not able to do the things that we love or loved because of our daily limitations, we start losing a sense of who we are, as our psyche defines it not just by our thoughts but also by our actions and interactions.

Tasks that once were our soul’s bread butter now seem impossible, and our inner voice goes on diminishing behind the ordinary tasks. Feelings of being lost and directionless in life may lead us to demotivation, anxiety, and depression affecting our overall contentment and day to day happiness.

To avoid being washed over by a cascade of unwanted unnerving emotions we should not allow the rut of the daily life stop us from making an effort to incorporate things which give us joy, inspiration, and peace.

If you don’t know what to do to bring that contentment, you need to find yourself and the dreams you once had when life was simpler and more in control. Any actions that we can take to help us find ourselves is going to be extremely valuable for us throughout our lives. Implementing some of these ideas can help us a great deal in our struggle to reconnect with our true selves:

  Lady riding a bike in the park

1. Find the things you love or loved doing, and do them: It’s important to have fun in life and if you can’t remember the last time you felt easy and in the flow then it means that you haven’t been having any fun that fully captivated your senses.

In our busy schedules as responsible adults, we often forget how great life can be because we feel crushed by the demands and dulled by the monotony. However making time every day to do things we like and enjoy is important not just to give us brief moments of joy but also to reconnect us with ourselves.

These activities could be like writing a poem or a story, drawing or painting, taking walks in the park or doing some sport. Promise yourself to do what you love regularly and experience your view about yourself and your passions changing. 

2. Reconnect with your dreams: Our dreams are the fires that fuel our lives and without a dream to work for and be excited about, there isn’t a deep personal meaning left for life. Ask yourself about your dreams that you carried in you before you got busy. Get a planner and jot down the dreams you had earlier and create some new dreams.

Answer to yourself these questions to guide you better. What are your strengths and strongest talents? What does your soul and heart ache to do? In an ideal situation you are free to do just whatever you wish, what is it that you would do? What would you love to be, how and where?

3. Get out of that dangerous comfort zone: Comfort zones are hazardous for growth and self-exploration, and because they don’t allow us to push and test our boundaries they lead to stagnancy and meaninglessness. While staying in our bubble might be safe, to do something unfamiliar, adventurous and spontaneous can be a great way to cope with stress, get invigorated, and find things about yourself which you never knew before.

Discovering new strengths and abilities which are revealed in testing situations can boost self-confidence and spruce up motivation to live passionately.

Lady sitting on rocks looking out over a beach

4. Be still, empty your mind and tap into yourself: Finding times of stillness and contemplation can be really effective and must be practiced often to be in touch with oneself. Mindfully doing your simple chores like shower, drinking tea and getting ready instead of doing them on default mode with a cluttered mind, is much more calming and grounding.

With our anxious mind and its continuous busy chatter it can be hard to make sense of where our life is leading us and how can we make it better. Meditation and other similar practices are important to realign ourselves and listen to our inner desires.

When we have a collected mind we are clearly able to see the opportunities and events around us that can give us hope and inspiration to act. Creating space beyond our frantic thought patterns will give us fresh ideas, insights about who we are and visions of what we should be doing.

5. Understand that being lost is okay, can be conquered and will result in good: Being lost is not something permanent and fixed rather it’s an indication that something needs to change. Feeling lost can be a pushing point to take a chance for yourself to find who you truly are. Not a single person exists who didn’t at some point need to ask themselves the customary “What should I do?” question.

For some it may take less time to figure that out, while for others it takes a bit longer. However, even when we are confused, life goes on and we keep learning lessons. It could be that some of us feel lost for longer or much later in life than others because our growth was stuck and we still had lessons to learn.

There is nothing bad or embarrassing about feeling like you don’t know. In fact, it can result in a great transformation if you trust your instincts, follow your heart and commit with dedication to your dreams.


Sherley AlabaAbout Sherley Alaba
An eagle-eyed wordsmith, a writer, and translator, always interested in ways which can help individuals (especially youth and women) reach their full creative potential. My focus has been on writing, producing and editing stories on business, finance, interesting personalities, entrepreneurs, culture, the environment, gastronomy, lifestyle, and social issues. Currently, she is associated as a blogger with Centra Care Florida, an urgent care center in Tampa and other cities in the vicinity such as Conway, Longwood, Orange Lake and others.
Twitter: @sherleyalaba