Project Happiness Articles — friendship

A few years ago I had a conversation with my cousin Stephen. We were catching up over lunch. He said something to me that was initially very offensive, and still sticks with me years later: "You are a really nice person, but it comes off very fake." Taken aback, I asked him to explain more. He shared that my perma-smile and optimistic attitude just didn’t feel genuine. He didn’t connect with my attitude.

This is why I have walked over 5,400 miles in 600 days over the course of the past 6 years talking to people about happiness and researching what we, in the United States, believe truly matters in life: identifying our common values and characteristics of a thriving nation.

Kindness. It costs nothing to give but can be invaluable to another. It seems like a very obvious ‘no-brainer’ to make use of to help in our own lives, and the lives of others. So how can there be such an absence of it in the world at times? The answer, hurt.

I believe that over the ages, through the passing of time. We have lost two incredibly important characteristics. I think that if we were to regain these two simple things, our lives would become so much better than they are, and we would be able to survive the storm that rages in our minds. The best part is that one of them leads to the other.

But despite finding ourselves in an environment of ever-increasing apathy and self-centeredness, there are actually a multitude of ways to generate a positive impact through practicing altruism, showing compassion, and most importantly, by taking real action.

Now that we live in the era of unlimited connectedness, we seem to have lost the single thread of our own stories that makes us so wonderfully human – our humility.

Make an effort to connect with friends, family, neighbours and strangers. Smile and make conversation at the supermarket, have a chat to the neighbour, phone a friend. Be brave!

But what does a great friend do that sets them apart? What can we do to make sure we are being the best friend we can be to those we love?